I was reading John Irvine’s latest offering Twisted River this afternoon. Hard copy. BIG book. Anywho, the section I read was a comic set-piece where the main character was trying to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on a very large lady. A large lady who was faking a choking fit in order to get the hero’s hands on her. As those of you in the know ehm, know this involves getting behind the poor bastard who’s choking and clasping your hands in front of them and with a sharp jolt squeezing them just under the ribs. The victim in the novel was so large breasted our hero had to lift her boobs out of the way before he could get near her ribs. So far, so amusing.
The point is that shortly after reading this I went in to the feed page of this blog to see who had been reading my pearls of wisdom and where they had come from. And get this. Somebody from Cardiff landed on May Contain Nuts after searching the following words on google...”the Heimlich manoeuvre was invented.”
After me...1,2,3....wooooooooo.
What on earth is going on? What kind of coincidence is that? There is NOTHING on this blog that would justify such a visit. So what the feck is going on? Is google totally off key? Or are we all connected in ways we are not aware of? And what does it mean? What is the significance of this event? Should I be driving in my car looking for choking people out in the streets? After all with great power comes great responsibility.
Spooky.
Just to test my theory I’m off to read the next section in Twisted River which concerns the hero’s 12 year old son, who clocks his father’s lover with a skillet, thinking she’s a bear. Which doesn’t say much for the hero’s taste in women. And then I’ll report back. Try not to get too excited at the possibilities, people. The world is our lobster.
I must be in the wrong place. I was searching for a lobster supplier,
ReplyDeleteSeriously, my web-mistress (does that conjure any spooky images?) alleges that every time you update your site or blog, Google sends it to the top of some list and supposedly sorts every word and phrase into its database. Looks like it works, which means I should update my website more often. Like more often than never?
Imagine the billions of night elves extracting this information from the gazillions of blogs, articles, news and reviews, and website updates?
Btw I typed in 'The world is our lobster' and didn't get anything. Maybe tomorrow...
maybe it only happened cause you spelled heimlich correctly. or capitalized the word?one must misspell or type in small caps to stay under the radar, perhaps? anywho, let me know if you enjoy the book because i've haven't yet and irving is an acquired taste.
ReplyDeleteBut I hadn't included the word in my blog until after the search was made, so your suggestions can't apply in this situation. Mental eh?
ReplyDeleteahhh, well then, it must be psychic google thingie i heard about. technology taking over the human mind even before it thinks of anything. they call it googamental
ReplyDeleteThea, you speak much wisdom. But you knew I was going to say that didn't you.
ReplyDeletebut you knew i was going to say it first
ReplyDeleteMichael! i just thought what you just thought i was going to think that you thought. and it was amazing. did you think that i would think that after what you thought i was just thinking about what you thought? i'm really liking this googamental thing, but you knew that because i know you thought that.
ReplyDeleteYou're all insane.
ReplyDeleteCorrect, Gillian, but only in a good way.
ReplyDeleteListen all of you, can we please get back to the point. Which was ... er
ReplyDelete(BTW, Michael, GREAT photo.)
What would be the fun in even searching for a point, Bill?
ReplyDelete