We decided that it was time the wee fella had a dog. A friend of a friend's dog just had a litter of 14 and was looking for a good home for them. Don't know if we comply with the elfin safety regulations for a "good home" but we'll give it a damn good try.
The pups are too young to be separated from their mother just yet, but because we are GOOD friends of a friend we got first pick.
When we walked in to the large kennel housing the doggy family, mum was feeding. I didn't know whether to look away or throw water over her screaming - NOooo, and she has 8 breasts!
(For those of you who are crap at irony - I read an article recently about a breast-feeding woman who had water thrown over her by an arsehole who - well, god only knows why these fuckwits behave the way they do.)
Anywho, the pups were a mass of writhing fur, latching on to a swollen teat while a brother/ sister tried to push it away. The wee fella looked at me and said, 'That looks cute and wrong all at the same time.'
The mummy labrador had 4 golden pups and 10 black ones. The wee fella decided he wanted a golden boy - dog is the correct term I believe - eeesh look at me, not even a dog owner yet and I know all the lingo.
The wee fella picked one of the livelier boys - see above - and is calling him Bob. Awwww.
While we wait for the pup, sorry Bob to open his eyes, grow a little more and get all his jags we have to come up with a Kennel Club name so that his pedigree can be registered. For those of you not in the know - excuse me while I act all superior - get me, doggy expert. I'll be on Dog Whisperer next week - the Kennel Club name has to be long-winded and dramatic. Like Roberto Dawnbreaker Persimmon Badinage. Or Lilly Shuttlebucket Apollo. Or perhaps even Sylvester Scraggyballs Breezebutt.
I'm struggling to pick one. I need something that suggests this dog is fun, lively, caring, comes from a good home and will never hump the legs of innocent bystanders.
Choices, choices...anybody got a good idea for Bob's Kennel Club name?
Sir Robert of Merrymaking Samaritans, no make that Sir neutered Robert of Merrymaking Samaritans.
ReplyDeleteI love Goldens. I had one that weighed more than me and dragged me all over creation. B.J.
Brilliant.
ReplyDeleteLet me know if you need any tips.
i, too, found the love of my life when a friend had an 'oops' litter. his name was beauregard and spoke french. might i throw a name out there: Robespierre, Lord of the Flying Golden Boys...aka Bob...p.s. hope he's not a Marley..for your mental health! Beau was a bit of a devil in his younger years! t
ReplyDeleteMarley, Thea - how about we merge your two suggestions into Robespierre of the Flying Samaritans. Do you guys have similar conventions when it comes to dog names?
ReplyDeleteRicky, I need tips. What have you got?
i didn't mean 'our' marley - i meant that movie about the housewrecking dog, Marley (Marley and Me) however, i like your blend suggestion. we only have similar conventions for dog names when they are pure bred. as your pup seems to be.
ReplyDeleteAw - he's so cute, Michael. Great addition to your family - look forward to some more Bob blogs.
ReplyDeleteHey Rosemary, I'll certainly be talking about Bob as he grows up. Or Boab, as we have to say in Ayrshire. I just hope I don't turn into a doggy bore.
ReplyDeleteThe temptation to respond to that last sentence was SOOOOO strong, but I resisted.
ReplyDeleteI like the idea of Robert plus an anagram of Malone followed by a massively pretentious ancestral home name followed by a homophonic echo. And if you're going to have Robespierre in there, you have to have Danton, too. That'll be five quid.
Happy to pay you Bill, just as soon as I work out what the feck you were saying.
ReplyDeleteYour bloody comprehension failures are costing me a fortune.
ReplyDeleteOk, a tip.
ReplyDeleteErm.......Never eat yellow snow.
Whits Boab's father and mothers Kennel Club names. It is the "norm" to put a wee bit of daddies name.
ReplyDeleteCannae mind, Rab. we're going for mix of the two homes he's going to be staying in.
ReplyDeleteRab is a guid Scottish name, and I have had many a dug ca'ed eftur me.
ReplyDelete